Travel Accommodations for Autistics

Many people travel more in the summer, but it can be very stressful, especially for autistic and neurodivergent people. For neurodivergent people, traveling often requires even more extensive planning and preparation. There are so many factors that go into planning a trip, and one of the main things we think about while planning to travel is comfort－ and of course, safety. As an autistic person, I know for me personally, comfortability is an integral part of whether or not my brain and body is safe and regulated; or else it might mean the trip is not even accessible to me as I am too busy in survival or meltdown mode to be able to even remotely begin to enjoy myself at all. If I am uncomfortable, my body is stressed and my brain is in fight/flight/freeze mode. I may be overstimulated in a new place with unfamiliar people and surroundings, without the safe places our routines that I usually retreat to when I need a break. 

I don’t want to live like that anymore. While I have traveled many times without accommodations, now that I am learning to intentionally honor my needs as a neurodivergent/disabled person, I have been taking more care to ensure that I can have a positive and accessible experience. Here are a few tips that may help you have a more positive travel experience, too. 

Airport/airline accommodations. 

Airlines have an accessibility desk or phone number where (from my experience) they answer your call with a genuine human person and do not keep you on hold with a robotic answering service. Note: I typically fly with United Airlines. There is another ADA issue from a recent trip that I will be taking up with them privately, but aside from that experience, United has been my preferred airline.

Here’s how my conversations with them have usually gone: “Hi, I have a disability and would like to request accommodations.” They never asked me for documentation for my disability (aside from providing the Department of Transportation form for my service dog, but that’s a different thing). I think the only thing they sometimes have asked is to explain how the requested accommodation would help alleviate some aspects of my disability. 

They always put priority boarding on my boarding pass. At this point I feel like they know I’m disabled since I have flown with them so much, but it would be helpful to give a quick call before each trip just to make sure you have priority boarding listed on your ticket reservation number if that’s an accommodation you need. Also, if you’re flying with a companion/friend, they put priority boarding for them, too. I’ve actually traveled with 2 other people and they did that for both of them. 

Priority boarding is extremely extremely helpful for both my autism and my ADHD. Being able to board first is actually essential for me now. I have very limited body awareness, and issues with navigating through crowds and tight spaces. The amount of times I have been trying to haul a carry-on-sized luggage and backpack with me through the aircraft aisles while everyone is already seated, and accidentally bumped into the people seated in the aisle with my body and/or bags and then apologizing profusely while still feeling hyper-aware of the pressure to keep moving as there is an impatient line creeping behind me, my anxiety can quickly go from 0 to 100 before I even find my seat. Also important to note is that sometimes when you board later on in the process, the overhead bins are already full with people’s stuff and you might run the risk of being forced to check your carry-on bag. I know for a fact that me and many other autistics have packed essential items in our carry-ons that we simply cannot endure an entire flight without－noise-canceling headphones, stim toys, comfort items, comfortable clothes, etc. Priority boarding ensures that I have as calm of an experience possible while boarding and ensure I have access to needed items. Also, I have a dog with me who needs his various supplies, too. 

I always ask for a seat more towards the front of the plane. I ask for this ahead of time by calling the accessibility line. Within reason, this request is usually granted, and I’m always moved up to the best of their ability. Sometimes I have gotten luckier than others, but I understand that the flight can be super booked and people have paid extra for preferred seating, which they absolutely are entitled to.  I recently realized that even if you look on a seat map, you may not see the availability that the airline person sees on their end. I think they explained that they usually reserve some of these spots for customers with disabilities so they don’t show up on the map. Again, sometimes I have gotten luckier than others and gotten in rows 9-12, and sometimes they still accommodate me to the best of their ability but they have no choice but to put me towards the middle. They have been very polite each time though. Usually I get upgraded to Preferred Seating or Premium Economy for free. These have more leg room, which once again is much better to accommodate for my dog who lays at my feet. I’m definitely not getting Business Class or First Class seating for free, though, haha, which is totally understandable. However, that being said, I would give up my seat in a heartbeat if someone ended up needing it more than I do.

There’s one main reason for requesting this accommodation that I have, on occasion, had to explain to them, and that can be summed up in one simple word－ DEPLANING. I’m not sure if this is autism or ADHD or my (diagnosed) anxiety disorder, or a combination, but I basically told them that deplaning is the most panic-inducing part of the entire process for me. People become straight up savages when the plane lands and it’s time to get off. There is supposed to be a system where you wait for the people in front of you to get their bags and go. From my experience, this often turns into an absolute free-for-all, and much like my above comments about how it feels to navigate and cope with this upon boarding, multiply that by 100. Plus intense claustrophobia kicks in, especially after enduring an entire flight, and my body feels trapped like I’ll never get out of there. So yeah, the main reason I need to be more towards the front is so I can get off sooner and quicker. And it’s probably annoying how many times I’ve brought the dog up, but he really does require special consideration and he usually needs to go potty ASAP.  I go to Hawaii a lot which is 6 hours, then a layover in California to make sure he relieves himself, and then make it back in time for my connecting flight of another 6 hours. 

Another service dog related side note as I need a space to rant about this－you know those pet relief areas in airports? Tipper REFUSES to use them. We’ve tried a few times, and the ones we have tried are so ridiculously smelly and dirty that he won’t even step one toe on that fake grassy area. Also he’s such a well-trained boy that I think he knows we are still indoors and he only goes potty outside. Which means that I have no choice but to take him physically outside of the airport and then (unfortunately) go back through TSA again to make my connecting flight. This takes time. Actually, I explained this to the accessibility desk one time and they changed my flights for free, and looked through every single possible option. They spent 20 minutes exploring every option, and changed all 4 “legs” of my flight to ensure at least a 2 hour layover in between each flight. Some budget ticket types don’t allow for any flight changes unless you pay a fee. So it was nice to have a free flight change to accommodate my disability and my fluffy precious 4-legged necessary medical “equipment.”

You can request guided assistance at the airport (or of course, wheelchair assistance if you have a mobility issue): someone will be assigned to escort you through security, the airport, and help you get on and off the plane. They will also help you with baggage drop/claim.

I have gotten escorted by the airport once before, when I was 16 years old traveling alone to India. That was very helpful for me and they stayed with me throughout my entire layover and helped me get where I needed to go. I could absolutely request this service as an adult, but I usually have a friend or family member with me that already provides the support I need. According to the Department of Transportation, the airline is required to “promptly provide the requested assistance,” and all you have to do is approach an airline staff and let them know you have a disability and will require guided assistance. 

You can request a sunflower lanyard at the airport which is a discreet way to signify that you have a hidden disability to help others acknowledge that you are disabled and can make it easier to ask for assistance if you should need any assistance. For a complete list of participating airlines and airports click here. I have not personally used this, but I love the idea. I will say though, I had checked online in advance to see if my home airport Newark Liberty International participated in this, and I confirmed that they did. I went to the first desk I saw, and asked the airport staff where I could get a sunflower lanyard. He had absolutely no idea what I was talking about. I believe this Sunflower Lanyard program needs some more all-staff training to increase awareness for all personnel. After looking it up, I discovered that they are available at The Welcome Center. I went to the Welcome Center out of pure curiosity, and no one was there. I left. 

Regardless, this has the potential to be very helpful for neurodivergent and otherwise non-visibly disabled people, and I imagine that once you get one once, you can reuse them for future flights. Or to avoid this type of situation, you can also probably just order a sunflower lanyard online and bring it with you! 

Quiet spaces and sensory rooms in airports. More and more airports are being intentional about making sure there are quiet and sensory-friendly rooms designated for individuals who need a calm space. Many of them are specifically designed to have various types of seating, low light, calming colors, and/or multisensory items to interact with. I hadn’t known this before, but I recently found out that Newark Airport does actually have a sensory room and I had no idea until I looked it up. Unfortunately, it was in a whole different terminal which was on the opposite end of where my gate was, so I couldn’t check it out. I think there should be a designated sensory room in each terminal to make it more accessible, but if I really needed a break, I could have used the prayer/meditation room which looked quiet and empty. There are also other spaces like “Rest Zones,” lounges, etc, that you can look into for any specific airport you may be traveling to. Having a plan, or just even having the knowledge that there are spaces to go to if you should need them, really does help.

Other things non air-travel related that have been helpful for me

Planning my routes in general

Careful consideration about the hotel: 

-Is it near a busy metropolitan area with a lot of street noise? 

-Are there appropriate food options for me nearby?

-If there are not, does it have a kitchen where I can prepare my own meals if needed? 

I have asked to switch hotel rooms due to odors. One time there was an overwhelming smell of bleach which was intolerable and I was moved. 

I need my own room. I shared a room recently, and even though it was a family member, I was so incredibly stressed out. 

I bring a speaker so I can listen to ambient music at night, which is what I do at home every night, so I try to find ways to duplicate my routines and environment as much as possible even while away.

Overpacking a ridiculous amount of clothes: this is necessary because I have no idea what type of fabrics or materials will feel right for my sensory system on a given day, so I need options. 

Planning in detail, the who/what/when/where of how my breaks will be possible. Pre-scheduling breaks if possible. 

Scheduling in advance, any big activities or excursions. Leaving a day in between each big excursion to recover and/or explore at my own pace.

I simply cannot do guided or group tours unless it’s only a day thing. I cannot tolerate being in a group for that long. 

Ideally, I need a few days both before and after a trip to pack/prepare before the trip, and recover after the trip. Transitions are hard. 

Traveling can be hard in general, but with the right support, I find that it’s well worth it. If my basic needs are met, I actually do really well with novelty and adventure and trying new things. Accommodations have helped tremendously, whether it is something I officially request, or if it is an accommodation I make for myself. Both can make a big difference in making sure your time away is accessible, comfortable, and enjoyable.