Embrace Autism

By: Dani Rodwell

Autism has historically been framed in a negative light by the mental health field, society, culture, and individuals. For too long, autistic people have been continuously pathologized and labeled as disordered individuals in need of “fixing” or “curing” (this is especially perpetuated by the field of Applied Behavioral Analysis-ABA.) We have been pressured to “overcome” our differences/challenges and forced to navigate a society without our needs or neurology in mind. While autism does bring real challenges, particularly in environments not inclusive of neurodivergent ways of being, the notion that autistic neurology is something to fix, hide, or be ashamed of is deeply rooted in stigma and ableism. Many autistic adults spend their lives judged, blamed, excluded, or completely misunderstood, leading to burnout, disillusionment, and a feeling of brokenness for not fitting into neurotypical molds.

The neurodiversity movement has opened up a new perspective, one where autism isn’t framed as a deficit or disorder but as a unique way of experiencing the world that is different, but not defective. This shift is transformative for both the larger society, and for autistic individuals themselves. Autistics can learn to not fear or hide autism, but to embrace autism. We can recognize its impact on our experiences, hold this identity with acceptance (and even pride), and understand it not as a flaw but as an essential part of who we are. Whether through self-identification, formal diagnosis or through self-discovery and reflection, embracing autism can be a liberating journey toward empowerment and authenticity.

A Legacy of Stigma and Misunderstanding

Historically, autism has been misunderstood and mishandled by both the medical community and society at large. Early characterizations framed autism as a tragic “disease” that separated individuals from the “normal” world, and the medical model of autism has typically emphasized deficits. With language centered around disorder and impairment, autism became something to be feared, avoided, and ultimately fixed.

These stigmatizing perspectives didn’t remain within clinical circles; they also significantly shaped public perception, too (and this was exacerbated by fear-mongering messaging put forth by organizations such as Autism Speaks). Parents, educators, and healthcare professionals often learned and operated under the belief that an autistic child must learn to “act normal” to thrive (or be more palatable to others). This outlook created environments where autistic traits—such as sensory sensitivities, stims, or alternative communication styles—were discouraged or punished. Autistic people were made to feel like outsiders, forced to mask their natural inclinations and suppress behaviors in order to blend in and conform, often at significant emotional and psychological cost. How could we embrace autism if the people in our life didn’t embrace us?

The Reality of Autistic Burnout and Masking

One of the most painful effects of living in a world built for neurotypicals is autistic burnout. Burnout is a state of physical and emotional exhaustion experienced by many autistic individuals who spend much of their lives masking, or suppressing, their natural autistic behaviors to fit into a neurotypical world. It involves constantly monitoring oneself to do things like avoid stimming, making eye contact, suppressing or tolerating sensory sensitivities, and navigating the social expectations that feel unnatural or even exhausting.

Over time, this masking takes a toll. For many autistic adults, the accumulated stress leads to burnout—a state of deep exhaustion, anxiety, and depression that can last for weeks, months, or even years. Autistic burnout isn’t just about being “tired”; it’s about the mental and physical exhaustion that arises from living inauthentically, from feeling forced to mold oneself to standards that aren’t aligned with one’s natural state.

Burnout and the experience of masking leave autistic individuals with the feeling that they are broken or fundamentally flawed. Many internalize this perception, leading to cycles of self-criticism, shame, and long-standing issues with feeling unworthy or broken. Many of us have been constantly told, in explicit and implicit ways, that our ways of being aren’t acceptable. This reality makes the process of learning to embrace autism even more powerful, as it offers a pathway to break through this long standing negativity.

Discovering Autism: The Door to Self-Understanding

For many autistic adults, the realization that they are autistic is the beginning of a transformative journey. Whether they self diagnose or choose to pursue a formal diagnosis, identifying one’s autism can change everything. This process involves reassessing one’s life and understanding past struggles, quirks, and preferences with a new, autism-affirming lens.

Neurodiversity-affirming assessment or support (like therapy or coaching) can validate and empower an individual, as an ND-affirming professional can help you unpack and unlearn much of this deficit-based understanding and reframe towards a more affirming understanding. Neurodiversity-affirming autism assessments look at autism through a lens of curiosity, nonjudgement, and acceptance. Sometimes we can even become able to celebrate our autistic traits rather than trying to push them away or hide them. When autistic individuals see themselves as (an amazing!) part of the natural diversity of human experience, they can start to let go of internalized ableism that tells them they are wrong or not good enough.

Embracing autism allows individuals to reevaluate the narratives they’ve held about themselves. We begin to realize that the challenges we’ve faced were often less about our autism itself and more about the environments we were navigating and the people around us who just fail to understand. This newfound understanding allows autistic individuals to replace self-criticism with self-compassion, to accept their unique ways of processing the world, and to advocate for themselves with greater confidence.

What Does it Mean to Embrace Autism?

Embracing autism is about honoring oneself fully, recognizing that one’s autistic brain is not something to hide, but something to own in its entirety. This process can be extremely empowering and relieving as we learn to accept ourselves and our needs without shame, blame, or guilt.

The neurodiversity movement emphasizes the position that all the many ways that brains are wired are valuable and should be accepted. Instead of seeing autism as a problem, this perspective creates the space for us to view it as an integral part of our identity that brings unique strengths and perspectives to the world.

Many autistic adults, once they embrace autism, discover that some of the very “traits” they were once shamed for can actually be assets. Hyperfocus can be a powerful tool for deep research and profound contributions to society, special interests or hyperfixations (however weird or quirky others may think they are) are actually an extension of our passion and fascination, sensory sensitivity can deepen our experience of the world around us, our social differences may be actually refreshing and appreciated change from the norm, and our many other skills such as pattern recognition and problem-solving can make us true groundbreakers in our communities. By embracing these differences, autistic people can begin to rewrite the story they’ve been told about themselves and step into a more confident, self-assured identity.

Unpacking Ableism and Letting Go of Shame

Embracing autism also involves unpacking ableism—the biases and misconceptions that society holds about what’s “normal” and “acceptable.” Ableism creates an environment where neurotypical behaviors are the “ultimate” goal while neurodivergent behaviors are stigmatized. As autistic individuals unmask and step into being their authentic selves, they also confront the societal standards that forced them to mask in the first place.

Unpacking ableism is not easy, as it requires a conscious effort to challenge the internalized belief that being autistic is somehow “less than.” However, it’s a necessary step in the journey toward self-acceptance. Learning to see autism as a natural variation in human experience allows us to reject the pressure to conform and instead embrace and accommodate our differences. This shift helps us let go of the shame we’ve carried and helps us let go of a lot of self-judgment and beating ourselves up for not meeting expectations that aren’t realistic.

Needs Identification and Accommodation

Once autistic individuals begin to embrace autism, they are better equipped to accommodate and advocate for their needs and engage in self-care so that we may continue to show up for ourselves and others. For so long, we may have neglected our own needs, trying to conform to societal expectations at the cost of our well-being. Embracing autism means learning to set boundaries, ask for accommodations, and prioritize self-care.

For example, an autistic adult may recognize the importance of sensory-friendly spaces and begin advocating for accommodations like quieter work environments or use sensory toys to help us regulate. They may also allow themselves to say no to social engagements that drain them, or to take breaks when feeling overwhelmed, without guilt or shame that we are not “doing enough” in our social lives.

Self-care becomes an act of self-respect and a way of acknowledging one’s own needs. By recognizing that we deserve to be comfortable and supported, autistic individuals can begin to build a life that is aligned with our natural state rather than constantly fighting against it.

Autistic Identity and Pride

The journey toward embracing autism includes the process of integrating it into our identities and accepting it as a core part of who we are, not just a label we carry. Autistic adults who have traveled this path often find that autism is not a separate aspect of themselves to be managed or hidden, but a fundamental part of who they are. This shift brings a profound sense of autistic pride, authenticity and wholeness instead of viewing autism as a set of problems or limitations.

Self-acceptance and embracing our autistic identity doesn’t mean that challenges disappear. Challenges will remain part of life. However, the sense of shame and alienation can fade. Autistic adults who embrace autism can live more in alignment with their needs, advocate for acceptance, and build connections with others in the neurodivergent community.

Time for Society to Embrace Autism

Embracing autism isn’t just a personal journey; it’s also a call for broader societal change. Autistic people deserve acceptance, understanding, and spaces that honor their needs and strengths. By sharing their stories and advocating for neurodiversity, autistic individuals can inspire society to become more inclusive, to question its standards of “normal,” and to embrace all forms of human diversity.

For those who are on the journey to embrace autism, welcome. The neurodiversity-affirming movement is strong and it recognizes the value of your perspective. By embracing autism, you’re not only affirming your own identity but also contributing to a world that’s more inclusive, compassionate, and understanding of all forms of neurodiversity.

To embrace autism is to embrace yourself, wholly and unapologetically. It’s a powerful step toward living authentically and making a lasting impact on the world around you.